The Brain (1988)

directed by Ed Hunt
Canada
94 minutes
3 stars out of 5
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I accepted that this movie would be bad from the outset and only watched it to fill some time, and for the most part it did turn out to be pretty trashy, but what I didn't expect was that it would also be so wild. Although it firmly confines itself to the parameters of a cliche late-80s horror/sci-fi hybrid and doesn't bring anything new to the table, it has moments where it's genuinely pretty fun to watch. 

I've spoken before about how I believe it's better to have patience when showing off a monster, and not rush into it and overdo it, spoiling the sense of mystery for the audience, but then there's The Brain, where pretty much the very first scene is of a giant tentacled brain. There it is, no doubt about it, here's the brain you all expected. Honestly, when the practical effects are this inventive and amazing-looking, and when the rest of the movie is so campy that any sense of genuine mysteriousness would basically fizzle and die, it's much less important to hide your monsters. I scream, you scream, we all scream for tentacle-brain.

It almost makes me sad that creature design like the brain in this movie would be so out-of-context if made today, and would probably be banished to being seen as a gimmick or an intentional throwback, because this brain thing is pretty awesome. It's never explained where it comes from, why the villain is trying to spread its ideas, or, perhaps most importantly, what the brain's end goal is for when it finishes taking over the world. It's just there, this gigantic brain with a face, a huge, snarling face that looks like a cross between a pug and a mountain lion, shuffling around on its brainstem (which is apparently NOT a tail, and the bad guy will admonish you if you say so). If not showing your monsters is my first rule of good creature design, not explaining your monsters could be my second.

Unfortunately, our friend the brain is the only thing this movie has going for it. The characters are all awful. The main character is a high school prankster who suddenly becomes the only guy who can single-handedly save the whole town. The most amusing thing about this is watching everybody run full-tilt everywhere because for some reason there's a foot chase scene about every two minutes. Like I said, it's fun if you have the right mindset, and I liked how simple it was and how "pure" it feels as a horror/sci-fi popcorn flick, but I don't think it deserves too big a spot in the history of the genre. Also, although it's never mentioned, it is Christmastime in this movie. So this counts as a seasonal review.