Phantom Monster Agon (1964)

directed by Fuminori Ôhashi, Tokuo Mine

Japan

96 minutes

3 stars out of 5

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Oh yes. KaiJune raids again.

I'm starting the month off with something that, I have to admit, I'm reviewing more because it's an oddity than because it's good. Phantom Monster Agon is a TV mini-series that is most notable for having been scripted by Shinichi Sekizawa, writer of many Shōwa-era Godzilla films. It's also been edited into a movie, but I recommend watching it in episode form, the way it was intended. All four episodes are easy to find with subs, and I'm constantly surprised that nobody ever talks about this when it's so readily available. Perhaps that's a testament to how middling it is.

So this is essentially Godzilla. Agon is a prehistoric reptile that was woken up by atomic testing and grew to abnormal proportions from consuming uranium spilled into the ocean. It's not just these characteristics that make him resemble Godzilla, though; the overall message of what Godzilla means as a symbol is also cribbed (can I say "cribbed" if it's the same writer both times?) here. The scientist du jour maintains a strong opinion that humanity deserves Agon, that it's our own mistakes coming back to haunt us. Repeatedly, every time it seems like Agon is beaten back, either the narrator or one of the characters is there with a warning that as long as we continue to abuse science, Agon will continue shadowing us.

The only face I recognized from the small main cast was Asao Matsumoto, who I probably remember from Ultraman, but I couldn't tell you what part he played in it. I'm sure I've seen him around. As for the directors of the series, neither of them seem to have made any films aside from this, but according to some trivia on imdb, Ôhashi assisted in creating the '54 Godzilla suit, which ultimately stopped Toho from suing Japan Radio Pictures, the studio who produced this film. Whether or not they'd sued, though, doesn't look to have made much of a difference, as the studio seems to have made this, two movies about judo, and then disappeared off the map.

I'm gonna be honest - most of the reason I want to talk about this at all is because the score is so bizarre. Far away is Akira Ifukube's compelling orchestral work or the jazzy energy of Masaru Sato. This sounds like an avant-garde performance in an abandoned industrial warehouse. You could stick this soundtrack in Begotten and it wouldn't be out of place at all. It's so discordant and jarring that it makes the whole thing downright creepy.

The storyline itself is thin, though aided by Sekizawa's writing. The first two episodes address the discovery of Agon, what it means for humanity, what we can do about it (basically nothing), and introduces us to our main characters, though we spend little time with them. There's a very, very slight romantic angle that's endearing in its old-fashioned-ness; the male lead teasing the female scientist after she breaks her ankle, calling her a scarecrow woman. The third and fourth episodes involve a pair of shady characters who have misplaced a suitcase full of drugs that happens to end up wedged under Agon's foot, which they enlist a terrified diver to recover, and then a bunch of stuff ensues that leads to the conclusion of this unmemorable series, which is that Agon gets too stoned to function, sets itself on fire, and wanders off into the sea.

I do not think this is good, but I do love it a little. I love every kaiju. (Surprisingly, we have the suit actor's name! Etsuji Higashi - like almost everyone here, this is his only credit.) This is just a really weird relic of the kaiju boom as it was starting to shift towards television, and it's kind of fallen by the wayside over the years. Toho themselves has released it on home video multiple times, so one can't even say it's been "forgotten", per se - it's just not very good and nobody really pays it any mind.