Sadako vs. Kayako (2016)

directed by Kôji Shiraishi

Japan

98 minutes

4 stars out of 5

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This is a movie that seems like it couldn't possibly be scary due to its premise, which at face value is inherently just really funny. What if we took two ghosts from two separate long-running film franchises and made them physically fight each other? Maybe it's funnier because of the nature of Sadako and Kayako themselves: they're not fighting ghosts, they're cursing ghosts. It's like if Bigfoot was spotted with an assault rifle. It's just not their style. The idea of them doing actual battle as opposed to their typical mode of attack, which is a slow, lingering, painful death, is hilarious. But somehow, despite the intrinsic humor of this concept, Sadako vs. Kayako still finds time to be genuinely eerie. I think that's all thanks to Kôji Shiraishi, one of my favorite Japanese horror directors, as he has only two modes: semi-unintentional comedy, and the scariest thing you've ever seen in your life.

So right off the bat I think this is really interesting in how it handles a version of the Ringu curse that's carried over into the modern day. I said in my review of the original Ringu that there's some inherent quality to it that forces it to remain stuck in the past, because no matter how much you change up the video format, the physical aspect of recording a tape, copying the tape, renting the tape, etc- it's all lost to time now that VHS is largely a dead medium. In Sadako vs. Kayako, the curse is widely known as an urban legend, and it's kind of tossed around frivolously because, again, nobody really uses VHS anymore- until the two main characters want to digitize a wedding tape. The dredging up of a filthy old tape deck, the chance discovery of the cursed tape inside it, and the novelty and innocence of the two friends' decision to watch it for fun, all of these things integrate seamlessly into the present-day setting with no need to mess around with internet lingo that could have made this age poorly. The internet is part of how the curse becomes distributed eventually, but it feels like a natural evolution instead of a shoehorning "hey we all use the internet now so we're obligated to have the characters be obnoxious tech-addicted teens". I dunno. I just think every separate element of this worked really well in tandem.

I may be biased because I'm a much bigger fan of the Ring franchise than Ju-on, but it did feel like Sadako had a bigger part in this than Kayako (and Toshio, as they're a package deal). The VHS tape feels more like something you interact with, but the house with the grudge curse attached is... somewhere you go or don't go. You can avoid the grudge house by just staying clear of the creepy old place that everybody tells you a bunch of people died in, but if you watch the tape you're done for. You can't exit the tape like you can exit the house.

(They also use a "new" video instead of the original seen in the first movie, which brings up a REALLY interesting concept: what if the video on the tape is different to every single person who watches it?)

But both ghosts do show up a fair amount, and again, it is done surprisingly well. Each individual appearance is creepier than the final battle, but even the showdown at the end is good. I was laughing when Toshio got sucked into the television, but somehow there's still a creep factor there. I think the way each ghost looked was crucial to this, because it seems like as the Ring and Ju-on series goes on, especially in the cheaper films, the ghosts can start to look kind of... shoddy. It's the small things that add up to this: their dresses can look too new, too artificially soiled and torn; the actresses might not be made up to look genuinely grubby enough so they'll just look like cute girls with some black makeup around their eyes; or (god forbid) they can be entirely CGI. But here, they all look convincingly creepy. Kayako in particular is as visually upsetting as she was the first time we ever saw her, and Sadako moves with an unnatural gait that drives home her status as something so dead and full of hate that she's barely human anymore. The curse victims are also acted and written well, and the element of tragedy that I feel is important to these films is there: it's always so accidental the way they get into these things, and that makes it so much worse. Nobody expected to get cursed but now they're all doomed forever.

I'm not saying I loved every single thing about this movie (my man Shiraishi still can't end a film to save his life, although in this particular situation it works in the film's favor) but it was loads better than I'd expected just by thinking of the pure absurdity of it. I just want to say one more time how deeply funny I find this concept. I've (obviously) been watching a ton of Godzilla movies lately and the final fight feels like nothing if not a kaiju battle. It has the same theme of two immensely powerful beings duking it out while humans are unable to do anything but watch, cowering, and hope that they don't become collateral damage. If they make a sequel to this I will watch it immediately. If they make ten sequels I will watch them all.