Monday, November 17, 2025

Guzoo: The Thing Forsaken by God (1986)

directed by Kazuo "Gaira" Komizu
Japan
40 minutes
4 stars out of 5
----

(This is a review “from the vaults”, so it might not be up to my current quality standards. Forgive me, but I’m too busy to write anything new again this week.)

This movie is a little short to get an entire review, but the myriad of excellent splatter films from Japan that came out in the 80s and 90s deserve recognition despite very few of them ever reaching close to an hour of run time. I don't think anybody is watching these things for the plot, and more often than not, the plot is simply a ticking clock counting down to the tentacle stuff, but in this case the monster's backstory is genuinely interesting, and even quasi-Lovecraftian. If we suppose that in this context there is a God who created all life, imagine a creature that evolved outside of God's purview, that God turned his/her/its/their back from: this is Guzoo, our unholy tentacle monster du jour. And it lives inside a summer house guarded by a mad scientist who keeps it at bay by playing a special song on a flute.

The creature design here is just miles above what I expected. This is the very definition of a typical Lovecraftian shambling monstrosity. It has very few defined parts - no resemblance to an Earth life-form, no discernible eyes or nose or a countable number of limbs, just snapping amorphous jaws at one end of a large, sticky, fleshy-looking body covered in unsettling protrusions and whipping tentacles. The size is perfect: it's not big enough to dwarf the humans, but it's not tiny enough to be silly. It’s just about the size where, if a dog that big came at you, you'd be really terrified. 

There's a specific frame towards the end of the film where two surviving girls are running through the house, trying to escape Guzoo, and for a second we see the girls and then Guzoo peeking through the doorway in the background, and I don't know why, but the way the whole sequence is shot is just beautiful to me- Guzoo feels so present, so there.


This isn't even a direct Lovecraft adaptation and it gets the whole "squirming tentacle monster" thing down in a way that makes said monster feel far more directly threatening than they typically are. For a splatter film, this veers far more towards dread than the gross-out effect most of its contemporaries go for. It doesn't feel like the intent here was just to make us lose our lunch. There's a distinct ominousness to Guzoo. Its appearance isn't just scary because it looks gross. There's something about Guzoo that conveys a sense of it not being right.

Everything just kind of fizzles out at the end, Guzoo turns into a harmless turtle (?) and the remaining girls limp off into the mist.  People got eaten, property was destroyed, wounds were dealt. But we'll never forget Guzoo, and we'll never stop hoping that maybe, just maybe, 39 years later, somebody with practical effects experience and a love of shot-on-video splatter movies will take up the Guzoo torch and bring the world a very belated sequel.

Monday, November 10, 2025

Guinea Pig 3: He Never Dies (1986)

directed by Masayuki Kusumi
Japan
40 minutes
3 stars out of 5
____

Trigger warning for suicide and self-harm.

After watching Frankenstein's Love, I was in the mood for more V-Cin. I didn't mean it this way, but this installment of the Guinea Pig series actually has a tenuous connection to Frankenstein's Love in that the main character is unable to die, much like Frankenstein's monster. I don't really know where I'm going with that, I just thought I'd bring it up.

He Never Dies follows Hideshi, a disaffected salaryman who, unhappy in his job and with no real purpose in life, wants to die. He cuts his wrist with seemingly no real thought behind it - it's just another thing he does aimlessly, listlessly, nothing better to do. But the bleeding and pain both stop very quickly, and Hideshi realizes that something is wrong with his body: no matter what kind of injury he inflicts on himself, he never dies. He doesn't heal - the stuff he does to himself "takes", and whatever damage he does is permanent, but it never brings him any closer to dying. We see Hideshi experiment with how far he can take this before he has the idea to invite one of his coworkers over and harass him with his newfound immortality.

I should mention at this point that this movie is arguably a comedy. I don't know if "comedy" is really the right word here, but I don't know what else to call a movie where you've got a guy with a plastic ruler sticking out of his head zombie-walking towards another guy who is wearing an Elvis mask and scaring the absolute daylights out of him. There's also something weirdly philosophical about all of this: it's only at the very end of the movie, when Hideshi has whittled himself down to just a head sitting on a table, that he seems like he's getting something out of life and having positive interactions with the people around him. Like he had to go through some kind of violent catharsis before he could realize that he wanted to live.

The main reason to watch this is the incredible gore effects. I think the last Guinea Pig movie I watched was Mermaid in a Manhole, and I distinctly remember thinking, at multiple points during the movie, "How in the world are they doing this?" It could be that the fuzz of 40-year-old film hides some of the rough edges, but to me, there was virtually nothing in He Never Dies that looked visibly fake (up until Hideshi was a disembodied head). The wrist-cutting scenes were uncomfortably realistic. There's a part where Hideshi cuts his stomach open and throws his guts at his coworker until we see his spinal column through his empty torso. It's extremely creative and a credit to the FX team that a "lowbrow" movie like this looks better than even a lot of horror movies shot today.

The only part about this I couldn't figure out was that for some reason it's presented in quasi-Unexplained Mysteries style by a white guy who, with classic "bad paranormal docudrama" panache, introduces the story of the man who couldn't die as one of a number of inexplicable phenomena (that are actually completely explicable). The white guy talks about the story as if it's a videotape that's been found and edited, but the movie itself is shot like a normal, professional film, not found-footage style at all, so it really doesn't make any sense. But then again, not much about this movie does.

Monday, November 3, 2025

Banshee Chapter (2013)

directed by Blair Erickson
USA
87 minutes
4 stars out of 5
____

"Can we go already? It's 2:45 in the morning and my eyes are bleeding."

I decided on Banshee Chapter for my Halloween night watch this year because having just seen The Thing in a theater got me in the mood for another movie that involves unknown entities puppeting human beings around. This movie has been an old favorite of mine since it came out, and it's one of very few movies that I've seen a multitude of times and have yet to get tired of - I might be mostly used to the scares at this point, but I still enjoy them.

Banshee Chapter is upfront about its basis in reality: from the outset the movie purports to be an exploration of what really went on during the U.S. government's MK-Ultra mind control experiments. Watching this in November of 2025, I unfortunately found the government's involvement to be the weakest part of the movie, to the point where it almost killed my immersion - maybe in 10 years, if we somehow have a semi-sane government, it'll be scary again, but right now, the government is openly doing things that are arguably far worse and much more materially detrimental than non-consensually summoning Outer Ones into the bodies of its citizens. That aside, though, if we can get past the concept that it's the government doing these experiments, the backbone of Banshee Chapter is scary as hell.

One of the highlights of the film is the video of protagonist Ann (Katia Winter)'s friend just before he (or his body, at least) went missing. We'll discuss the movie's quasi-found-footage style in a moment, but this part is shot as genuine found-footage. In the midst of research for his novel about MK-Ultra, James (Michael McMillan) gets his hands on a sample of the drug that was used in the original experiments and ingests it himself, with a friend filming the whole thing. This sequence of the movie is creepy from start to finish, but the thing that really bothers me about it is that it makes it very clear that the drug doesn't solely effect the person who ingests it. When it kicks in, James's radio starts picking up weird signals that his friend who's filming him can hear - as in, the drug summons something to the general vicinity, not just into James's mind. This right here is the really terrifying part of Banshee Chapter. If you take a drug and it makes beings from another plane notice you and come possess your body, then whatever, sounds like a you problem. But if you take a drug and it makes beings from another plane come and haunt your entire house and everybody else who happens to be in it, instead of just restricting itself to you, that's a little more serious.

As I just mentioned, the filming style is sort of a mix of found-footage and otherwise, and the camerawork has a kind of loose, handheld style that isn't quite Cloverfield-level shakycam but also feels like it could easily just be somebody accompanying Ann with a camcorder. You do keep expecting her to turn to whoever's holding the camera and make remarks about the film, but it never happens. The result is that we feel like we're seeing everything unfold in real-time, even though there are the normal cuts and time-skips between scenes that we expect from a typical narrative film.

Most of the scares in this movie are jump scares. I never thought I'd be in the position of having to defend jump scares, because for the most part I'm of the opinion that a lot of horror movies don't know how to use them properly, but in this case Banshee Chapter happens to be really adept at knowing exactly how much of its horror to show (and when) to create a sense of consistent unease that lingers even when the disturbing imagery is not on-screen. It's a really brilliant move for a low-budget horror movie, too: show a few cumulative seconds of the creepiest shit you've ever seen and spend the rest of the movie having people trip out of their minds and talk about horrifying things. That being said, though, one of the scariest scenes in the whole movie is actually not a jump scare: when Ann is in the abandoned experimental facility and sees something shambling down the hallway towards her, my god, that was freaky. We don't see enough of it to make it out - all we can see is the outline of something that's stretching out its human costume like a tall man trying to wear a too-small shirt.

As effectively scary as this movie is, it feels like it's destined to forever be one of those things that doesn't really get a lot of mainstream recognition and mostly relies on word-of-mouth to be seen at all. Every so often I hear people talk about it, and the tone is always mild surprise: usually something like "Hey, have you heard of this thing? I went into it blind and it's, like, really creepy". It's not a perfect movie, and I think I might be starting to see more plot holes now that I've seen it so many times, but it remains distinctly unsettling in a way that a lot of horror movies fail to be.

Saturday, November 1, 2025

From Odo Island to the Big Island: 70 Years of Godzilla in Hawai'i

(I'm publishing this simultaneously to my other blog.)

Last year, we celebrated 70 years of the first Godzilla film, and next year, we'll celebrate 70 years of its American recut, Godzilla! King of the Monsters. But this year was the 70th anniversary of something that, I would argue, is even more interesting: the opening of the Hawaiian run of the original Godzilla. The newspaper clippings I'm going to present below are the very first English-language reviews of the film, and the version of it that critics were watching was uncut, un-Raymond-Burred, and English-subtitled. 

I'm going to do my best to cover some of Hawai'i's rich theater heritage in this post, but for a wider exploration of the subject, you absolutely must read Lowell Angell's Theaters of Hawai'i.

Part I: Hawaii Times


On October 3rd, the first rumblings began... a tiny ad on the second page of the paper indicated that something unusual was on its way. In recent years, Hawaii Times had reviewed contemporary American sci-fi and horror movies: Creature from the Black Lagoon, Invaders from Mars, etc, but the Japanese films that were being shown at the three theaters covered by the paper's film department (the Kokusai/International, the Toyo, and the Nippon) were markedly different. Mother dramas were overwhelmingly popular, as were musical comedies starring the likes of Hibari Misora and Chiemi Eri, and if there was any hint of genre fare, it was in the form of kaidan films; many starring Takako Irie, all jidaigeki. This was the first modern Japanese monster movie, set in modern times, and it must have come as a shock.


On opening night, Hawaii Times previewed the film. In both the preview and the review from a few days later, the face of the film is Takashi Shimura, the only member of the cast who Hawaiian audiences would have been familiar with. HT's film reviewer, James T. Hamada, conjectures that the film's cast of young unknowns may have contributed to the theater being fairly empty during the premiere. (If I may interject, Hamada had seen Akihiko Hirata three months earlier in Itsuko and Her Motherand Hamada's review marks the first time Hirata's name appeared in an English-language publication.)

Us Godzilla fans tend to have great respect for Raymond Burr for reprising his Steve Martin role in Godzilla 1985 because he genuinely cared for Godzilla, despite warnings that it would be bad for his image, and I don't think it would be too much of a reach to say we could probably feel the same way about Takashi Shimura. I don't know Shimura's personal feelings about being in the movie, but without a recognizable actor like him, Godzilla's initial appeal in the West may have been even lower.


Hamada's review of the film appeared in the October 6th edition, in a much longer column than was usually given to film reviews. It is fascinating. Hamada had some qualms about the movie's realism in practical terms, but praised its special effects right off the bat.


The most interesting thing to me here is that Hamada seems to understand that the film intends to present Godzilla as one of a species, and accordingly he uses the word "godzilla" without capitalization and as a plural, the way one would say "dogs" or "cats". Hamada comes away from the movie with the idea that "a godzilla" is something like a made-up species of dinosaur. The takeaway: Godzilla is not a character yet. Godzilla is just a big animal.

As someone who has not infrequently been the only person seeing a movie, when Hamada says "70 or 80 persons" attended the screening, that sounds like a fair amount to me. But the Kokusai could seat 1,200 people. Announced in 1939 and opening officially in 1941 with design by Hego Fuchino, it was one of many theaters in Honolulu, sitting in the 'A'ala Park district right next door to the Toyo, which also showed Japanese films, including some produced by Toho. After and during the war the theater was often referred to as the "International", the English translation of its name.

photo courtesy of Edna Kijinami, from the flickr account of Chie Gondo

The Kokusai, at its opening, was owned by Sanji Abe, president of Kokusai Kogyō. In September of 1942, Abe was arrested and placed into an internment camp for allegedly owning a Japanese flag. He was transferred between three different internment camps until being paroled in 1944 and released from parole in February of 1945. He would return to promoting and importing Japanese films after the war.

Part II: Honolulu Star-Advertiser



I include this as it does fit the scope of this article, but I should note that the balloon was not a strictly Hawaiian story. The above clipping was actually taken from the October 19th, 1954 edition of The Plain Speaker, published in Hazleton, Pennsylvania; Honolulu Star-Bulletin re-ran it in December of that year. You will notice that the publication date is several weeks before even the first limited-release screenings of Godzilla within JapanThis means that Americans were aware of Godzilla from the very, very beginning. Photos of the balloon must have made their way from Tokyo to American newspaper offices within days.

As for Honolulu Star-Advertiser's coverage of the film itself, it was fairly extensive. William W. Davenport writes about the film after having seen a showing at the Kokusai, the same theater featured above. This clipping is from the October 7th, 1955 edition.


Although this article feels more sensational than Hamada's, several takeaways can be made. Davenport, for whatever reason, does not seem to be aware of the Romanized spelling "Godzilla" and uses "Gojira" throughout his review. He baldly spoils the film's ending but refuses to describe the Oxygen Destroyer in detail. We also learn that an advertising short film played after Godzilla: a "musical documentary on the soft drink industry" produced by your friend and mine Bireley's. I have to say, I can't really tell what the critic makes of the film itself, but he seems impressed with Godzilla as a monster.

Part III: Hawaii Tribune-Herald

The first Hawaii Tribune-Herald mention of the film is used on Wikipedia to claim that the earliest English usage of the name "Godzilla" occurred on November 20th, 1955, which, as we have seen from the Hawaii Times material above, is not true at all.


Not to get personal or anything, but when I read "Walked home afterward under comforting stars, never so big and brilliant. Hua caught up with me presently. 'I saw Godzilla, too,' he said." I wanted to cry. Imagine walking home under the beautiful night sky in Hawai'i with your friend after being one of the first people to watch Godzilla outside of Japan.

This second mention is vanishingly small, only an ad, but it introduces us to our next theater. I want to mention the Mooheau Theater because it only existed for a scant six years after showing Godzilla and was then destroyed in a tsunami. As this ad is from November 5th, either the writer of the above review saw the film in another theater, or was recollecting his experience after the film had left local theaters. The author would not have seen it at the Kokusai as this paper was published in Hilo, not Honolulu.


Because the theater was destroyed such a long time ago, most information I have about it is anecdotal. It apparently existed as far back as the late 1910s, and it seems that it began showing Filipino and Japanese imports sometime around the 1940s. One Lawrence Akutagawa writes in a Google Groups post (that I'm really not even sure should be public) that the Mooheau catered to "more formal Japanese dance" and was, like the Kokusai, situated on a street with several other theaters.

Wreckage of Mooheau Street, credit to Craig Miyamoto

Part IV: Further Historical Context

Most theaters during this time were single-screen. Movies rotated in and out of Hawaii's theaters relatively quickly, since, basically, if you can't show a bunch of movies at the same time, you have to show a bunch of movies in rapid succession instead. From my own research, I found that some films would become massively popular (such as Hideo Ōba's Always in My Heart, which was evidently a smash success) and be held over or return for several repeat runs, but this was fairly rare during the 1953-1955 years that my research focused on. It's frustrating that we can't get a clear picture of attendance for Godzilla during its original run, and anything I come up with would be total conjecture, but if we assume that attendance was low at the Kokusai and probably much lower at the Mooheau (Hilo circa 1950 had some 200,000+ less people living there than Honolulu), allowing for a week-long run in both theaters would give us numbers perhaps in the low- to mid-thousands.

I unfortunately couldn't drag up any interior photos of either the Kokusai or the Mooheau, but this is the Waikiki Theater, which sat 1,353 people, and so would have been a roughly similar size to the Kokusai.

The interior of Honolulu's Toyo theater. From State Historic Preservation Office.

Another solution to not having multiple screens within one theater was to just have a lot of theaters. It may seem odd to us today to think of a street with several movie theaters on it, sometimes right next door to each other, but again, we have to consider that these theaters were single-screen and often specific film companies would have vested interest in them - so one theater would specialize in Daiei films and rarely show anything else, or another theater would frequently host traditional dance performances along with movies, et cetera.

(I am, out of necessity, focusing on theaters that showed Japanese films mostly or exclusively, but I don't want to make it sound like these were the only theaters in Hawai'i; due to its incredibly diverse population, theaters showed imported films in a multitude of languages, as well as your usual run-of-the-mill American oaters and sweeping melodramas.)

Another early Japanese theater, the Honolulu-za, ca. late 1930s-early 1940s. From Hawai'i State Archives.

One last thing to consider is that the concept of a movie having English subtitles was, at least in this specific time and place, fairly new. From context it seems like the bulk of the audience for imported Japanese features during the early- to mid-1950s were people who could actually understand Japanese - unlike today, when it's easy for anybody who doesn't speak a lick of the language to see subtitled features in a theater. The following is an article from mid-1954 concerning the recent introduction of English subtitles to the Japanese features playing at the Nippon Theater, and it takes possibly the most logical tack towards subtitles that I've ever heard: if you don't need 'em, don't read 'em.


Therefore, despite what may seem like a very small and limited run, Godzilla arrived at a time where the odds were actually more in its favor in terms of reaching a larger audience than they may have been just a few years prior, when it would not have been subtitled.

Conclusions

I know this was a boring one. Thanks for reading. I have to go to bed now.

No, really. The popular opinion of the Godzilla series in America has historically been a matter of clueless Westerners poking fun at the sweaty guys in rubber suits bonking each other around while ineffectual miniature planes on visible wires fly overhead. We have held that opinion because what of Godzilla that has reached our shores has largely been an adulterated form of the original work: ever since Godzilla, King of the Monsters! we've been fed recuts and bad dubs, pan-and-scans and late-nite TV reruns. We are of course in the kaiju renaissance now: "tokusatsu" is a word in the dictionary, Minus One won an Oscar, Eiji Tsuburaya has been inducted into the Special Effects Hall of Fame, there is a vague sense within academia that Japanese monster movies may be worth looking at closely.

But I want us to remember that there has always been an undercurrent of admiration for these films. From the very earliest days, there have been people appreciating Godzilla films. I want us to know that before the SNL skits and the MST3k episodes there were people like James T. Hamada who saw that something respectable was being done - that the effects were, in fact, good. I want us to think about walking home under the stars in the late autumn cool, talking to our friends about the giant lizard we just saw level Tokyo, the paleontologist and his empathy for the creature, the star-crossed lovers, the scientist fighting with his own conscience, and what it all meant.